Why Involve Your Family in Planning Your Funeral?

Young carer walking with the elderly woman in the park

While some people prefer not to think about their funeral while they are still alive, many people find it useful to plan their service in advance. For some, this is all about reducing financial strain on the people they leave behind. For others, this is about getting the send-off they want.

However, this isn’t a job you have to do alone. You may find that it helps to involve your family in the decisions you make at this stage in your life. Learn more about why you should involve your family in planning your funeral.

Make sure you get the funeral you want

The key benefit to organising your funeral in advance is the fact that you decide how things will go. You can choose your coffin, service, hymns or songs, type of celebrant and flowers.

You don’t leave things to chance here in the hope that your family will respect your wishes. If you preplan and prepay, you decide everything in advance with your funeral director. They then carry out your exact wishes after your death.

This gives you immediate comfort and peace of mind. If you tell your family about your plans before you finalise them, you’ll make your wishes clear.

As well as appreciating the fact that they don’t have to make difficult decisions later, your family members will know that you planned everything and were happy with it. You’ll have involved them in the process and made them aware of key decisions and why you’ve made them.

Avoid family friction after your death

The stresses of organising a funeral for a loved one aren’t just financial. Your family will want to give you a respectful and loving send-off, but they may not be sure how best to do this. If they don’t know your wishes in advance, they have to decide what to do.

This can cause some friction. For example, one of your children may have an idea of which hymns you would have liked at the service. However, another one of your children might be convinced that these weren’t your favourite hymns at all. They may argue over your favourite flowers or which coffin you would have preferred.

Disagreements over these details may not seem a big deal, but they can turn into major arguments. Small problems seem bigger when you’re grieving. Arguments over how to organise your funeral and fights over who knew you best could create divisions that fester for years.

If you talk to your family about what you want and don’t want, then everyone knows the score. They don’t have to argue about your likes and dislikes because you tell them in advance.

Help your family come to terms with your death

Some people are a little uncomfortable with the idea of preplanning somebody else’s funeral; however, this can have positive emotional effects. If you involve your family in this process, you could help them come to terms with your death and make the grieving process easier for them.

For example, as a parent you want to help your children negotiate their way through life as smoothly as possible. Even when they become adults and have lives of their own, you want to look out for them. If you involve your children in your funeral planning, you’re giving them a gentle reminder that you won’t be around forever. In a way, you help them start to prepare for your death.

When the time comes, your family will have more space to grieve and to celebrate your life. They won’t have the distraction of organising your funeral. They will know what to expect because you’ve already explained what you want to happen.

To learn more about the advantages of preplanning your funeral contact Cremations Only. We can also give you advice on how to involve your family in this process.